Bonfire of the Vanities, Week 1,295...

...Or at least it feels like it. So it wasn't the best week to me tohost, in hindsight, but that's due to my lack of strategeric planning and no fault of yours. Busy or not, I'll lift my spirits by reading the... worst... posts of the... week. Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit eating paint chips. This weeks' Bonfire is brought to you by the King of S&!*ty PostsTM, Markos of the Daily Kos1. No one knows crap posts like the bloggers at Kos where you don't have to wait long for evidence-free commentary on why Global Warming is Bush's fault, Cindy Sheehan isn't insane, and Karl Rove is developing a super-virus that only affects minorities!2 "George Bush hates the Bonfire of the Vanities" -K. West Let's get started! Is there a chemical spray that can kill posts like this? If this post was a gorilla and it escaped the zoo, you'd shoot it. Just sayin'... A-Team posts = teh aWeS0m3. A-Team posts regarding Sheehan = poo It's like hot, coed webcam action... but without a webcam and with sailors instead of girls Were you married to Christie Brinkley? Then pipe down Every rose has its thorns Good advice, abhorrent super hero Arrrgh... this post must walk th' plank. Arrrgh. Twice Arrrgh... Walk the plank... and then hold still while we beat you with the plank Cat-bloggers DO NOT CLICK THIS LINK To earth and even beyond, still no one cares No taunting the ACLU, peon... We could really care less about Hollywood celeb-types When balanced scale analogies go bad If this post were a license plate - N0TBL0G Oh my... This is nanoblogging... and it stinks Bad post? Circle one: Yes / No / Maybe A boobie post? Not bonfire material... maybe the best post of the week Pithy? You betcha! And also done in the very traffic efficient Uber-funnel form - making every entry vague and ever-so-clickable. Because everyone loves traffic! We here at FIU pride ourselves in brutal, yet classy and efficient bonfires. Our previous BotV hostings are here (week 96) and here (week 106). It's by sheer coincidence that we've hosted the carnival every 10 weeks - honest. Thanks for reading! Future bonfires - two open spots soon: Week 117 (Sept 27) - The Zero Boss Week 118 (Oct 4) - Get in there Week 119 (Oct 11) - Rent this space 1. Not really 2. Not really... ok maybe. We all know Karl... (Entry deadline was Noon EST, 9/19) More File it Under...