This just in...

Sue-happy idiots are not exclusive to the US! A Chinese primary school teacher and a beautician have filed a suit against CNN in New York over remarks they say insulted the Chinese people. They want $1.37 billion in compensation - $1.06 per person in China, a Hong Kong newspaper reports. I'm planning on suing Hugo Chavez for offending me and insulting Americans. $1.06 per American seems to be the going rate. I figure I'll have much more time to post on FIU when I'm not working because of my nine-figure "retirement" bankroll. Dulce!